GIVE IFANI THE PUNANI AND HE’LL BE JUST FINE!

The only thing that rapper, iFani needs right now is some punani and he will be in tip top shape.

That is, if his recent Twitter tell-all is to be believed.

iFani took some time out of his schedule this week to field some questions from fans on social media.

But some of his answers left fans wondering about his mental state of being.

One fan asked the rapper why it is that he sounds so “depressed” in his tweets.

The 33-year-old hit-maker said everything was just peachy, but he would be much better if he could get some punani, even from the fan herself.

In isiXhosa the rapper responded: “No, I’m fine. Just give me some punani and I’ll be fine. Wait, how old are you? If you’re young then organize some punani for me. I will be fine. I promise”.

All of this candidness stemmed from one concerned fan who asked him what had happened to his music career.

It has been two years now since the country last heard of the famed Mthatha-born rapper.

The Ewe hit-maker, whose real name is Mzayifani Mzondeleli Boltina, last released a single in 2017 but has fallen off the radar ever since.

And if you were wondering where the rapper has been, there is finally an answer for you.

When a fan recently asked the rapper where on earth he has been and what has happened to his music career, iFani called it dead.

“It died. Obviously,” he said.

This isn’t groundbreaking information, however, as iFani did always promise to give us only four albums and no more.

When the rapper first started releasing music, he did so under a plan which was divided into four stages, or quadrants.

Each quadrant had a particular meaning and purpose for him being in the music business.

At the end of the fourth album, like on a Cartesian plane, the circle would be complete and he would move on with his life.

And that is exactly what he is doing.

The rapper, who holds a Doctorate in Philosophy, is pursuing other interests.

“Now I’m pregnant with a new one. Had a miscarriage last year. Who knows…might give this year. It might be twins or quadruplets,” he said.

See his obsession with the four quadrants?

iFani also took the opportunity to set the record straight on a number of issues, including his old beef with Cassper Nyovest.

When asked if he “loves” Cassper now, he said: “Yah, I do. He’s so rich. And so fit. And so awesome on the mic. Now, can someone reload my music on Apple?”